If she did it again, she wouldn’t

Ben likes to hang out at the land, if he gets the opportunity. We don’t own it yet. It would be nice if we were close. Maybe we are. Just waiting on the trustees. Maybe they meet twice a year. That would make sense.

In the meantime Ben has been making friends with the neighbours. They bought their bit of land at the same time our vendor bought ours. They built a house on it. She said if they did it again.. they wouldn’t do it again. Too stressful, too hard.

So I was asked the question again. Do I really want to do this? I guess there are challenges she hadn’t anticipated, difficulties she hadn’t thought of.

In the eyes of the optimist, we are realists. In the eyes of the realists we are pessimists. I’m sure we haven’t thought of everything that will be a problem, of all the challenges that will come our way. But we expect challenges and problems. It’s taken most of a year not to buy the land. And that’s just the beginning.

Yes, I still want to do this. I just hope we get the chance.

Transition

Birch is wondering whether it would be fun to walk by himself. The big children walked quietly into their new classes for a taster morning at their new school, and we walked round a rather dingy three bed semi for rent, a bit like our old one but not so nice. We are in transition. We are always in transition, just sometimes it’s more obvious than others. This time last year we were making the change from a family of four plus cat to a family of five. The cat is currently on holiday but we hope he’ll come back and be our “plus cat” again. We miss him.

Maybe that’s the trickiest thing about times of transition. You don’t quite know what you’ll miss when the change comes, you also know you’ll never get there, which is to say that you never get to a place of no change, at least not this side of the Big Box.

It did feel like a lot was changing today. Myrtle was pleased to be in purple rather than green. She still seems so small but she set her chin purposefully and in she went. What a fantastic thing, to watch your children face a challenge and have what they need to take it on and come out the other side, smiling. They both had a good morning at their new school. Myrtle found a girl who shares her birthday so obviously they will be friends. I think it was harder for Red; he’s going into year five where the friendships are firmer and the new children will always feel new. He is one of three new starters in his class which may help, and the teachers didn’t put the new kids together which is a good sign. They felt welcome, and Red’s class had a discussion about a book we have at home (The Giving Tree) so he was well prepared.

I am so relieved and very thankful. They are going to be OK. It’ll get harder, but won’t ever seem quite so scary again. And they turned out to be resilient and courageous. It wasn’t too much. It won’t be for me either.

Still waiting on the land.